Pretty Bird!, a Parable by Mikaela Jade Taylor

Recently, something reminded me of an old proverb, where a woman named Aesop, who had just lost a very important part of her life, got a weird vibe about someone else in her tribe and decided to test her loyalty.

She gave the woman with the weird vibe and her husband, two well-known business owners in their community, a safe with her priceless possessions in it and asked them to hold on to it for her while she went to sandier pastures for a little while.

The woman with the weird vibe took the safe with a huge smile on her face and said, “Of course, I’ll give it back when you return. I’ll keep your safe, ‘safe’ for you.” Aesop told the woman with the weird vibe, “Thank you,” and left for sandier pastures.

Not expecting her to come back, and certainly hoping Aesop wouldn’t return, the woman with the weird vibe would walk by the safe, curiously, and stroke it like the blind kid in the wheelchair in “Dumb and Dumber” who would stroke his headless bird and say, “Pretty bird!”

Aesop, before returning, sent a memo to the woman with the weird vibe’s husband, asking him to send her the safe. The husband didn’t answer for five days and then said, “I thought you gave that to us.” Aesop, thinking, “Is this guy serious?,” said, “I do remember saying that,” without saying anything more. It didn’t need to be said. They knew the deal, and after all, this was a test of loyalty. The woman with the weird vibe, by this time, had tried everything she could to figure out what was in it and had already made up her mind to keep it.

Some time passed, and Aesop returned, already knowing how things would go at this point, and having other things to tend to, so she waited a bit and came back for her safe. The woman with the weird vibe answered the door and told her she couldn’t have it back, and that it was hers now. Aesop pleaded with her, “Please give me my safe back. It has my possessions that are priceless to me in it.” The woman with the weird vibe rudely slammed the door in her face, and Aesop left, empty-handed, without her priceless possessions.

A few minutes later, after staring at and stroking the safe for hours every day, like the blind kid in the wheelchair in “Dumb and Dumber” stroked the bird with its head taped on, saying “pretty bird,” the woman with the weird vibe said, “I knew I’d get it from her,” to her husband and demanded that he crack it.

The husband, reluctant at first, finally caved and decided to go all in on betraying Aesop, who was his friend first and had spent years helping him solidify his company. He spent months and could not penetrate Aesop’s beautiful safe. He would spend hours thrusting at it, trying to get it to pop open, but just couldn’t get his tool inside it.

Finally, after months of spending every day attempting to crack this safe, while his wife was stroking it harder than ever, a hinge popped. Three days later, the other hinge popped. The woman with the weird vibe, with stars in her eyes, just couldn’t wait, and together, they forced it open.

To their surprise, there was a little person in the safe. Even crazier, they were breathing and saying something, but they couldn’t understand what he was saying. He was sitting on an object with big wheels, holding something. They pulled this person out, and they didn’t know it, because they had never seen the movie and had never interacted with the boy, but it was the blind kid from “Dumb and Dumber” in a wheelchair, stroking not one, but four dead birds with their heads taped on, saying “Pretty birds!”

The woman with the weird vibe said, “Oh, how cute!” Her husband, a famous businessman who loved showing off his good deeds, said, “Oh! This is perfect! Taking care of him will play well in front of the townfolk!”

Unaware that everyone in town already knew who the kid was, changed his clothes to all-white just in case anybody recognized him and started parading the blind kid from “Dumb and Dumber” in a wheelchair, stroking four dead birds with their heads taped on, saying “Pretty birds!” around town.

Aesop, going for her morning run, saw them parading the kid around in a wheelchair, stroking the four dead birds with their heads taped on, saying “Pretty birds!” as she slowed her steps to a complete stop, her face now etched with sorrow, not because of the situation, but for the woman with the weird vibe and her husband. She pushed through the gawking crowd, her gaze fixed on the spectacle.

“You have failed,” she said, her voice heavy with disappointment. “You have failed the test I set before you. You stole what was precious to me, and now… this.”

She gestured towards the blind kid from “Dumb and Dumber.” “You see only a curiosity, a spectacle. You have no idea what you even have. You think he merely strokes a flock of dead birds and utters nonsense. You are so wrong. You see, when he is with his mother, he is the most articulate human you have ever seen. A being of immense understanding and power. And he is calling for her.”

The blind kid from “Dumb and Dumber,” stroking the four dead birds with their heads taped on, saying “Pretty birds!”, began tilting his head towards Aesop and then started chanting in a language no one understood, the dead birds in his hands now trembling. A single tear rolled down his cheek. Aesop said “Yes, sweetheart?, and stopped and listened, her eyes widening.

“He says,” Aesop translated, her voice trembling, ” ‘Mommy… Mommy… I heard them talking about you from the second you left. I heard them mocking you for sending for me and why. They kept me in the dark, they stole me from you. They treated me like a thing, a puzzle to be solved. They kept me locked away, and now they mock me. Save me and your other four brainchildren from these cruel ones.’ “

A wave of dread rippled through the crowd. The air grew heavy with unspoken fear. They now realized who the child was.

“By your actions,” Aesop continued, her eyes filled with tears, “you have not only betrayed my trust, but by stealing my safe with my brainchildren in it, you have also sealed your fate. You have made yourselves a symbol of utter ignorance, cruelty, and deceit. To steal the brainchildren from someone so pure, so misunderstood… your names, your reputations, your very livelihoods, will be utterly and completely ruined. From this day forward, everywhere you go, you will be known as what you are: frauds and opportunists.”

Aesop finished speaking, and a hush fell over the crowd, broken only by the soft, mournful chant of the blind kid from “Dumb and Dumber.” The crowd was staring in disbelief that this couple, who appeared like the best, were actually just frauds putting on “The Show.” Then, as if a dam had burst, the sky erupted, and the entire crowd was now surrounded by thousands of dead birds flying all around. Not just any dead birds, but birds with their heads haphazardly taped back on, their broken necks twisted at unnatural angles.

The ending, already written, but previewed below, will be released at a future time.

To Be Continued . . .

Preview:

And with each second, a chorus of voices, once filled with amusement and love for the adorned couple, now laced with venom, echoed through the air: “Pretty birds! Pretty birds! Pretty birds!” The irony was a physical blow, each “pretty birds” a reminder of their grotesque mockery and opportunism.

Preview 2:

From that moment on, their lives became a living hell. Every market, every street corner, every doorway was a gauntlet of flying projectiles and mocking cries. Everybody knew who they actually were. They became a walking, breathing testament to their own cruel stupidity, forever haunted by the dead birds and the broken chant.

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